Here is some thai wisdom from my Facebook friend, ข้าพเจ้าทองพูน บ้านบางหวาย:
“If the father to play blog. This evening to eat salt.”
Internet has given us so much. But there are many distractions. It is quite possible to see a whole (real) life drain down the online plug-hole. I remember catching a fragment of a wife speaking with Dr Phil about her husband who spent his days playing World of Warcraft. The husband explained how the game worked, how you participate in attacks on targets to get weapons and treasure. So Dr Phil asked him to show the audience some of these weapons. Everyone cringed. This family was on the brink of losing everything because he was not working. He was oblivious to their plight. In his book “Life Strategies” Dr Phil develops this idea.
Graphic from FunnyJunk.
Accountability may be called in, in one fell swoop. An unguarded word, an act of rage, a judge’s verdict. The future is changed forever as relationships shatter, doors close and our course is taken from our hands. But there is another slower, process in which the coils of accountability quietly constrict. Day by day, hour by hour, we turn our attention from creating and growing to focus on those compelling distractions that entice us from the appropriate choices, stances and actions. Demanding less of ourselves we put at risk our families and our future. Until the questions begin to eat at our hearts and we hold our heads and ask “how did I get myself into this mess?”
We create our own experience through choice. With every choice we make comes a consequence. When you choose the behaviour you choose the consequence.
Are you owning your feelings of anger and hurt, or are you choosing to blame others. Blaming is a self-preservation skill which positions us in the role of victim. We choose to be a victim by insisting that someone is being mean, unfair or ugly to us. We can also do it by insisting on believing we are right, and all who disagree with us are wrong (therefore the impasse is not our fault, it’s theirs).
Accepting our role in problems, acknowledging our accountability, allows us to seek solutions. There comes a time when “It’s not my fault” just fails to cut it. Actually, this time is always. Maturity begins when we lay aside this fantasy and take ownership of the outcomes and causes playing out in our lives.
Focus on those things that will truly change your life. Stop blaming those who aren’t responsible for your results.
The Tee-shirt comes from Banana Lane.
You are accountable for your life. NOW! You have always been. You always will be. This is not a theory, or an offer. This is a statement of reality. Wherever you find yourself now; good or bad, successful or unsuccessful, happy or sad, fair or unfair; you own your life. You are accountable NOW. Whether you like it or not; that is how it is! It is not that you will now start creating your own experience; you always have been creating your own experience. Refusing to accept this accountability leads us to misdiagnose every problem.
Are your ready to reframe reality, reassign responsibility and get on with the story you want to write for your life?
So what is on your T-shirt today?